How to create Wealth–Hard work or pure luck

Have you ever thought about how rich people became rich? Is it really hard work or just being in the right place at the right time?  We have all witness people who have established wealth but I wouldn’t say it all came from hard work.  Is it something out in the cosmos that place people in the right place at the right time and/or allow a person to be born in a wealthy family?  I also know people who have been working hard, dedicated, honest and selfless who has been working to establish millionaire status and it haven’t happened yet.. I know because I am one of those people who have worked hard but wealth seems to be far from reach.  One thing is for sure the rich keep getting richer in that wealth creates more wealth.

If the universe is listening I ask that you spread some of that “luck” on me. 

What are your thoughts on this subject? I am curious to know.  Let’s figure this out!


Reality TV–Deal or no Deal !!

Since we are experiencing a major influx of “Reality TV shows”, I often follow stars of the shows on twitter just to see what they are talking about or what they are doing. What I am finding is that most of these reality shows are just one big marketing scheme. Almost all of the people on these shows have a product they are trying to sell or as result of being on TV develop a product. What is so amazing to me is how people are really buying these products or supporting the madness, but many of you would not support people in your own hometown or family who is trying to sell a product that may be of better quality, or condone bad behavior.  Well, why would you promote the behavior of some of these people on “Reality TV shows” and make them rich? My thought is since people are quick to buy all these t-shirts, lip gloss, clothing, and books, I challenge you to try and push your product on some of these reality stars and see if they will return the favor and support you or buy your product. People often have to beg just to get a response to their tweet, but they surely do not have to beg to get you to buy their product, or come and support them at an event, or download their song from iTunes or buy their sex toys. If everyone would require “Reality TV” stars to give what they are getting, then everyone could have a shot at success.

THINK ABOUT IT!! You have bought several items from a popular “Reality TV” star, now ask that person to just mention something you are selling in their blog or twitter, and see if they will do it.. I am willing to bet you they will not, in fact they probably will not respond to your request, that’s just how much they appreciate your support. One sure way people can achieve success is if the ones who have already “made it” pay it forward and give back what they have been given.

You will not have to beg for a “re-tweet” or “Shot out” if you stop supporting what they are trying to sell or promote. If everyone would stop buying their products going to clubs to see them when they come to your town, stop downloading their songs from iTunes you would not have to beg they would be more than happy to oblige you because they are trying to get your business…

CHALLENGE: Please request a “Reality TV” star to just mention your product in their blog, consider this your barter. After making this proposal then come back to my blog and share your experience let everyone know if it was a DEAL OR NO DEAL..


I was approached by a gentleman who asked me the question, “What makes you happy”, being that I was caught off guard I could not provide a quick response. So I slowly responded, “Living – Living makes me happy”. The gentleman smiled and said, “I know you are thankful to be alive and/or living but what other than that makes you happy”.  As I slowly walked away it resonated that I really don’t know what makes me happy, and I could not honestly answer that question. The remainder of the day I ponder the question, hoping to find an answer–but other than the things I am thankful for  i.e. life, health & strength and family, I don’t know what makes me happy.  So that I would not be in this situation again I decided to focus on what makes me happy and I came up with the following list, these are all things that makes my heart smile:

  1. Spending time with my son when he is in a good mood;
  2. Seeing my mother with a smile on her face & happy;
  3. Knowing my father is healthy;
  4. Seeing Aniya and hearing the pitter-patter of her little feet;
  5. Spending time with my sister & my nieces & everyone is in a good place;
  6. Being loved—truly loved by someone who fulfills my highest good;
  7. Having a girls night, eating appetizers having mix drinks as I analyzing relationshipsJ ; and
  8. Being able to pay my bills, have occasional shopping sprees and still have money in the bank.

I later conversed with the gentleman, this time I was hoping he would ask me the question again.  And just like I had wished, he asked me again, he said, “now are you ready to tell me what makes you happy”, and like a little girl at Christmas I went down my list of things that made me happy.  Feeling good that I could finally answer the question, this man turned to me and said, “damn, what I really was hoping you would tell me was how you like to be caressed or “made love” to.  He went on to say, “based on your answer I take it that the “presence” of a man is low on your list of priorities, or more importantly you have never really been loved or in a loving relationship, and the main goal of the man is to make you happy”.

WOW!!!—I was left speechless…..  What’s happening to me? Am I oblivious to the fact that I have never really been in a loving relationship, so much so that I am in denial?  What do you think?

Now, my question to you is → Do You Know What Makes You Happy???

** Please post your response, I want to see your answers…….

Different Place

Today I arrived in Rochester MN – My travel was good but I had one misfortune, the airport lost myluggage.  I was so caught up in the fact that I had made a decision and followed it through that I have yet to get as angry as I usually get.  I know it is crazy but it feels good to be in another state, with a change of scenery.  Although, I hope they find my luggage soon before I come back to reality.


Lately, I have met some exceedingly intriguing men, but one thing I have found they all have in common is the need and/or desire for the occasional “fling”.  I don’t know if I have the words “WILL HAVE SEX THE FIRST NIGHT” written on my forehead but this is getting extremely bothersome.  So I decided to write this blog about Non-Negotiable Terms, for all the ladies that are encountering the same situation.

I can implicitly say I know what I want from a man and/or relationship. If I take time out of my busy schedule to spend time with you, and indulge in long midnight conversations then I have some type of interest in you.  I am leaning more toward a dating arrangement and not a sexual arrangement.  I can get sex on my own and would not have to invest time conversing and going out on meaningless dates. I know this is more like the male perspective, but it is true.  There is always a man out there willing to “give it” to you with no strings attached.

Why in the beginning (before they get the sex), men talk about how they want to be in a meaningful relationship with a “virtuous woman”, and bombard you with empty promises, although we don’t know it at the time, such as, “I’ll be over to mow your lawn next week”; “how much does it cost to get your hair done?” “I’ll get your toes and nails done for you Friday”; and “how much you say that bill was?” Men will go through all of this knowing all he wants from you is a sexual relationship.  Once you “give it” to him, your position immediately change from a 1st round draft pick to 10th round, and what’s so pathetic ladies, we know it.  You sense it as soon as you walk away from that bed and/or when he walk out that door, you get this feeling in the pit of your stomach, but you hold on hoping this one will be different from the rest.  But I am here to tell you, he will be no different, especially if you notice the following signs — you always got to meet at his house, your house or at the hotel; dinner is always takeout with an excuse for why you all can never go out to dinner, movies or for a drink; he is always working late, which means he can only come over to see you LATE.  He wants you to believe he is so “in-to-you”, but you haven’t met your family or friends and getting him to meet your family and friends are out of the question.

Before you know it, you find yourself head over hills for this man, but since you gave up the cookies on the regular, suddenly the calls are becoming slim to none, the weekly “ hookups” are less frequent and more meaningless and without emotion.  You find yourself making excuses for his lack of attention or failure to show up.  “Maybe he was too busy to call me the last couple days, I know he is working two jobs”. And just when you start making your suspicions known, he hit you with the famous “JEDHI MIND TRICK” you know when a man try to take control of your mind and make you think it’s you with the problem and not him. You are so disordered, wondering if you over reacted and before you can think of a backup plan {to smooth things over}, he is GONE; leaving you oblivious to what just happened.  Can you believe it?  Your lover affair is over before it got started.

That is why; in love & relationships nothing is NEGOTIABLE.  When you are trying to land that man, you must establish a set of terms, reasonable of course, and stick with it. Believe me, men love a confident woman that knows what she want and don’t want.  Don’t let a man “take you to fast”, believe me ladies the romance will not last.   Remember, when it comes to affairs of the heart there are no exceptions to the rule— so stop giving up the “cookies” without making him work for it. I don’t care how hot and steamy his kisses are you must not give it up to soon. Do not indulge in the sex talk that only raises your suspicions and his.  Do not send naked photos of yourself, and get offended if he sends a naked photo of himself, some things must be left to the imagination.  Be confident and let that man know you refuse to pay “premium prices for poor quality”.  Get to know the man first, allow it to get beyond the façade everyone put on when they first meet; who knows you may not even like the man.  If you want to find real love, please stand firm, you must let that man know that your love has NON-NEGOTIABLE TERMS.


Why is it when we are blessed to come from a family that truly love us and care about our well-being, we rebel, and instead of embracing the love, and understanding the genuine concern, we complain and end up turning to people who could really careless.  We allow hormones and the need of acceptance of another (man or woman), to control our actions and we don’t realize it because of the negative emotions that have been built toward your family.

I encounter many people, and observed their family make up, and I am here to tell you having a family that loves you and really give a damn about you is priceless but you will not believe it until you don’t have it anymore.  We must remember that love come and go, but family love continues to grow. When you have or have not, when you sick or healthy family will be there unconditionally accepting you flaws and all {yes, we all have flaws no one is perfect}. So if you have FAMILY LOVE in your life, thank GOD daily because in this day and time family love is a rare commodity.   And now that people are getting older and dying off, and this world is getting wickeder, we may not have much longer to enjoy this love as we have come to know it.  I BEG YOU to tell your family you love them, give thanks for the people who has been there for you, because believe me someone has been there for you, if not, you would not be where you are today.  Stop walking around your family with your eyes slanted, we must stop taking family love for granted.

“Family Love may appear small & worthless while you are on the receiving end, but lose it, and you will learn at once, how big and precious it is……

Stranger within Me

There is a stranger that lives within me, and I can’t get her to leave.  She preys on my emotions, and she takes over my mind, body and soul leaving me struggling for control.  My days are extremely long, and my nights are even longer, Lord when will I get some peace just make me stronger.  To some I come across combative and angry, others say I am cold and cunning — I don’t know why I am just trying to be me. This battle has gone on so long, I have lost the sense of myself,  I often have to pray just to figure out what’s left. For those of you who have close encounters with me on a daily basis let me apologize in advance for the person that shows up but is not really me.  I ask that you take in consideration that most of my negative reactions are evidence of my subliminal struggle to adjust to the visitor that has taken residence within me.  Now, that I am addressing her, I can feel the pressure slowly release, yes I am searching and will conquer the soul that is truly me.  Once I find her someone must leave, and it definitely will not be me.

 This message is my eviction notice to this unwanted tenant who has been in control for a long time now.  I refuse to be unhappy and no longer want to be cold, just want to be happy filled with positivity and peace-with this message I release the stranger within me.



I usually write about love and/or relationships but today I am writing about a topic that is so deep to me I had to write about it, you guessed it death.  If you knew the date and time your life would end how would you live your life?  Would material things take on a new meaning and the thought of finding love make you more selective? Or would you feel you need to try everything you can before your time runs out?

Is it just me or does it seem that everywhere you turn someone is dying both young and old.  Just a week ago a 15 year old young man life ended as he was on his way home from school.  The vehicle he was riding overturned and he was ejected and after several days of fighting for his life lost the fight and died.  I can’t stop wondering what his day was like, did he feel any different than any other day or does death really creep into our existence like a “thief in the night”.  What was going thru his mind during the final hours? Did he reach out to love ones by some extraterrestrial method?  I know death is something we all will have to succumb to, so why isn’t the pain easier? One would think it would be easier especially since we know that death is ultimately the final outcome of our physical existence as we know it.

I lost my brother-in-law several years ago and his death still haunts me today. In 2010 I lost my uncle and all I can relate to is devastation. When will the soul become numb to the feeling and eventually allow you to disconnect and move forward with your life?

All I know is, I don’t like the end, I rarely say good-bye, and neither do I want the finale just move on to the new beginning. We can’t protect ourselves against random crime because we don’t know when it may occur, and we can’t save ourselves from the wrath of death because it is our final calling, a call we MUST answer. In the interim all we can do is live life to the fullest because this is all you get. If you haven’t did something you want to do, do it; If you haven’t said something you want to say, say it- because tomorrow may never come.

Should I stay or Should I go?

Have you ever been in a relationship with someone you know was not good for you but for some reason you just could not bring yourself to leave?  This person never has time for you, not interested in your desires, needs or wants, doesn’t have an outlook on life, only want you around when he needs sex, but yet you continue to call him your man.  What’s with that? Why do women stay when they know they should go?

I believe women focus on the best times of the relationship such as the initial meeting when both of you put your best face forward.  You know the times when the man is opening doors, taking you to dinner & a movie, and the sex is spectacular, steamy and hot. Guess what ladies?  You are holding on to {MEMORIES} you just haven’t realized it.  Whenever your intuition tell you to leave, “this man is not worthy of you”, your heart invoke those {MEMORIES} that make you think you are in love.  Maternal instinct kicks in and tenacity coupled with faith leads you to believe any day now things will be just the way you dream they could be.

It’s not your fault that you want to believe in a man, as a little girl females are instinctively conditioned to someday be a wife and/or mother.  As a result of the aforementioned women have the tendency to take care of others and in return seek {“LPP”} a  lover, provider and protector in a man.

But women must learn self-love and separate the {MEMORIES} from reality. True happiness will come when you learn to love yourself and hold out for a man that can love you for you and appreciate your worth.   You must let go of the notion that you NEED a man to be complete, stop coveting his attention; instead require that man to be a lover, protector and provider.  You must insist that the love you give is reciprocated because it is unfair for you to always compromise what you want and need in a relationship. Ladies, you know what I am talking about; those times you have settled and/or lower your standards just to have a man.  I beg you don’t do this anymore because I promise you he will not just settle for you.

I am of the opinion the only way to have a relationship and/or love that can stand the test of times you got to be selective and not afraid to let go of something that is not right for you.  You must step out on faith knowing that the right man is out there waiting for you all to cross each other’s path.  You must carry yourself like a lady but handle the selection process like a business deal. You must not be oblivious to the fact that sometimes the rain will fall and it will even storm sometime but when and if that man is right for you the gates of heaven will open and the sun will shine every time believe me {I truly believe this}.  We can’t make relationships last because we keep picking the wrong person.  And what happens when something is not truly meant for you? You lose it; unexpected problems occur over and over, take heed to the signs.

So the next time you are in a relationship and something just doesn’t “feel” right and that voice in your head tells you to move on. But for some reason you can’t find the courage to let go.  Ask yourself the following questions:  (1) Am I truly happy {remember separate memories from reality}; (2) Does he fulfill my highest good? (3) Do we share similar interest? (4)  Is he abusive mentally, physically or verbally? (5)  What has he done for me lately? (6)  Do I love myself and content being alone until I meet Mr. Right; and (7) Am I settling for him because I am afraid of being alone?

You must answer the aforementioned questions as truthfully as possible, but keep in mind they are only prerequisites to what you should expect or receive from your man and/or relationship.  But one thing for sure your response will let you know SHOULD YOU STAY OR SHOULD YOU GO!


Finally!  I have come to the realization that men really are not “wired” like women; unfortunately my revelation was not soon enough to salvage past relationships.  I have often tried to dissect the male’s way of thinking but always come up short as result of my female inheritances.

For instances, the statement “I want to see you” lead one to believe that the person actually wants to “see” you, maybe watch a movie,  talk politics and even play a game of bowling { Wee game of course}.  However, I have learned that’s not the case with {some} men.  If a man say “I want to see you” that can mean a variety of things so you better have a good understanding of what his intentions are, if you do not want to find yourself  in a compromising situation.

What happen to the old saying, “say what you mean and mean what you say”?  Women must learn to understand what a man is” really” trying to say below I will give you a few examples, so read carefully.

I don’t want you to go, but if you must go I respect your decision” –I want to breakup but don’t know how to tell you;

You don’t have to worry, she is not my type” – I can’t wait for you to leave so I can get her number

That’s not what I meant to say” – That’s what he meant to say, just don’t want to hurt your feelings or argue.

“I need space” – He is interested in someone else but want to hold on to you just in case it don’t work out.

Ladies, I am sure you can relate to the aforementioned phrases. Think about it, has a man ever told you “I don’t want to get married” and six (6) months later marry a female he dated only three (3) months.  What he was really trying to say is that he did not have any intentions of marrying you and guess what? He will not marry you.

I know you are saying, “He really likes me, he takes me out often and call me every day”.   I have found that men can be cunning when pursuing what they think they want but once they get the prize, they become complacent and gradually lose interest.  What will it take? How can you understand a person that never really say what he means or mean what he says?  However, ladies I must admit sometime we share the blame in that we only hear what we want to hear.  Yeah, I said it…

It is evident that women are truly confused when pursuing a man? What does he want? Does he really like me? Will this relationship have the opportunity to grow or will it just crash and burn?  These are some of the many questions women of all ages, race and creed are desperately seeking the answer to.

I am of the opinion, that if men would provide insight to what it takes to maintain their interest maybe, just maybe the sanctity of marriage will have true meaning again.  And for non-married couples, the term “committed relationship” would display a guarantee of an exclusive partnership.

I guess by now it is evident that I want to see long-term relationships again; and most importantly I want to see men pursue women for “real relationships” and not just as an object of their “sexual” desire.

Am I wishful thinking?? Is true Love a thing of the past?  What do you think? I want to hear your comments.

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