Should I stay or Should I go?

Have you ever been in a relationship with someone you know was not good for you but for some reason you just could not bring yourself to leave?  This person never has time for you, not interested in your desires, needs or wants, doesn’t have an outlook on life, only want you around when he needs sex, but yet you continue to call him your man.  What’s with that? Why do women stay when they know they should go?

I believe women focus on the best times of the relationship such as the initial meeting when both of you put your best face forward.  You know the times when the man is opening doors, taking you to dinner & a movie, and the sex is spectacular, steamy and hot. Guess what ladies?  You are holding on to {MEMORIES} you just haven’t realized it.  Whenever your intuition tell you to leave, “this man is not worthy of you”, your heart invoke those {MEMORIES} that make you think you are in love.  Maternal instinct kicks in and tenacity coupled with faith leads you to believe any day now things will be just the way you dream they could be.

It’s not your fault that you want to believe in a man, as a little girl females are instinctively conditioned to someday be a wife and/or mother.  As a result of the aforementioned women have the tendency to take care of others and in return seek {“LPP”} a  lover, provider and protector in a man.

But women must learn self-love and separate the {MEMORIES} from reality. True happiness will come when you learn to love yourself and hold out for a man that can love you for you and appreciate your worth.   You must let go of the notion that you NEED a man to be complete, stop coveting his attention; instead require that man to be a lover, protector and provider.  You must insist that the love you give is reciprocated because it is unfair for you to always compromise what you want and need in a relationship. Ladies, you know what I am talking about; those times you have settled and/or lower your standards just to have a man.  I beg you don’t do this anymore because I promise you he will not just settle for you.

I am of the opinion the only way to have a relationship and/or love that can stand the test of times you got to be selective and not afraid to let go of something that is not right for you.  You must step out on faith knowing that the right man is out there waiting for you all to cross each other’s path.  You must carry yourself like a lady but handle the selection process like a business deal. You must not be oblivious to the fact that sometimes the rain will fall and it will even storm sometime but when and if that man is right for you the gates of heaven will open and the sun will shine every time believe me {I truly believe this}.  We can’t make relationships last because we keep picking the wrong person.  And what happens when something is not truly meant for you? You lose it; unexpected problems occur over and over, take heed to the signs.

So the next time you are in a relationship and something just doesn’t “feel” right and that voice in your head tells you to move on. But for some reason you can’t find the courage to let go.  Ask yourself the following questions:  (1) Am I truly happy {remember separate memories from reality}; (2) Does he fulfill my highest good? (3) Do we share similar interest? (4)  Is he abusive mentally, physically or verbally? (5)  What has he done for me lately? (6)  Do I love myself and content being alone until I meet Mr. Right; and (7) Am I settling for him because I am afraid of being alone?

You must answer the aforementioned questions as truthfully as possible, but keep in mind they are only prerequisites to what you should expect or receive from your man and/or relationship.  But one thing for sure your response will let you know SHOULD YOU STAY OR SHOULD YOU GO!

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3 Comments

  1. jolynproject said,

    May 13, 2012 at 3:50 am

    You are so right with this one. It’s time not to settle. My friend and I were talking about relationships and men and she told me that men have it too easy. Men do not have to work as hard because of the lopsided ratio of men to women. However, that does not mean we should settle, change who we are, fight with other women over one man because of this fact because at the end of the day, happiness is key and if we are not happy then the relationship will suffer and will break down whether it looks pretty on the outside or not. And by the way, it seems your blog is mainly about relationships so far and thought I share a few posts that I’ve written on this very topic. Here’s the first: http://thejolynproject.com/2012/01/21/give-a-love-relationship/ and here’s the second: http://thejolynproject.com/2012/04/23/learn-love-mate-a-person-or-a-possession/ Hope you enjoy and give me your feedback.

  2. jolynproject said,

    June 4, 2012 at 3:16 am

    Hey I nominated your blog for The Commentator Award. http://thejolynproject.com/2012/06/04/give-the-gift-that-keeps-on-giving-the-commentator-awardreader-appreciation-award/ Thank you for commenting on my blog!

  3. jolynproject said,

    December 19, 2012 at 12:00 am

    Hey I wasn’t sure where to put this but I nominated your blog for the Liebster Award. 🙂 http://thejolynproject.com/2012/12/18/give-the-gifts-that-keep-on-giving-awards/ Thanks for sharing thought-provoking posts through your blog.


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